Eres’s stew had gone down wonderfully. Honestly, he hadn’t expected the girls to be so enamoured with his cooking. He cooked a lot in his last life, and he remembered most of what to do, so working the muscle memory into this body had been easy enough. It felt as if he was remembering a lot of the steps rather than learning them for the first time, and the campfire cooking seemed even more familiar. Even so, he was happy about it. Watching the pair devour their bowls and then shyly hold them out for seconds was endearing if nothing else. He wasn’t so impressed with it himself, making a few mental notes on spices and herbs he would need to pick up in the next town to bulk it up even more.

  He even went so far as to pull out one of the notebooks in his bag and make some notes on possible trail recipes, taking what he knew about what his companions liked and trying to come up with ideas and combinations that would keep and be easy to store. Even with their enchanted bags, he didn’t have a way of stopping things from spoiling, so most of his impromptu brainstorming session boiled down to ways to use dried and salted meat and make more of the pre-mixed soup and stew bases. He enjoyed the process, writing little notes by the side of the recipes as he thought of them, letting his mind wander to various places.

  The crackle of the fire and the soft conversation of Freya and Myla were a soothing backdrop to the exercise, and soon he could feel his eyes beginning to grow heavy. Eres sighed as he put the book and pen back into his bag and looked across the fire. The pair across from him seemed to be just as close to dozing off as he was, and he figured it was about time to bed down for the night. It was hard to tell with the storm still whipping above them, although the thunder and lightning had been absent for some time now, but he knew it hadn’t been long since true dark fell.

  “Alright, shall I take the first watch?” Eres said, standing from the rock he was perched on and brushing the dirt from his hands along his trousers. Just standing was enough to shake a lot of the sleep from him, and he smiled as he saw the others try and fail to shake the sleep from their eyes. “Come on, I will tend the fire and keep an eye out. Who wants the second watch?”

  “I will take it.” Freya yawned before continuing, “Sleeping in shifts is easy enough for me 'cause of waking up at all hours for chores. Plus, it means I can make sure you are both getting enough rest and are healthy.”

  Myla nodded shyly. “I tend to be a little hard to wake up,” she said, face flushing a little, “So it’s probably best to put me on first or last watch.”

  Eres nodded at her, a grin stretched across his face. She was adorable, especially for a woman who wielded a polearm with such skill and strength. It often seemed like the brash tomboy she had been when they first met had vanished as she grew up, but Eres knew better. She might have gotten a little more shy over the years, but she was still a bundle of energy and excitement half the time.

  Eres shook the thoughts from his head as he concentrated on the swirl of Mana in his Core. A deep breath and a mental prod got it moving towards his hands as he concentrated and honed his mental image before conjuring four long javelins made of the solid purple energy that all of his magic constructs consisted of. Keeping all four of them stable and ready for fighting was more of a challenge than he had imagined, but as he hefted one into his hands, the burden lessened.

  Interesting, Eres mused, Does physical contact make it easier? Or is the image just stronger for this one because I can actually hold it in my hands, feel its existence?

  He shrugged as he tested the balance of the javelin. He could test it more on the road; for now, he needed to make sure he kept a good watch. He walked around the outside of their little camp a few times, making sure he knew likely entrance and exit points. By the time he returned to his little perch by the fire, he could hear the sounds of soft breathing coming from the women's tent. He settled in for a long and tedious few hours, keeping himself alert by sketching in another notebook

  He figured that maybe an hour or so had passed when Eres realised that he recognised what he had been sketching. The page was full of smaller studies, the curve of a jawline, the swell of a pair of lips, the sweep of a brow and the shadow of a collarbone. This was common enough for him, but the fact he recognised every feature he had sketched out as either Freya’s or Myla’s was surprising, to say the least.

  “Wow,” He sighed, closing the book and sliding it back into its place in the bag, next to pots of ink, quills and a pouch of needles. “I got it bad…”

  He slumped onto the stone. He knew he had been doing everything he could to ignore the issue at hand, at least in his head, but everything was pointing at his head and his heart having a difference of opinion. He didn’t want to put any pressure on the situation, he wanted to let this new relationship where he wasn’t a noble settle down so he could try and work out if it was a good idea to even broach the issue.

  “Gods,” Eres grumbled, pushing the heels of his palms into his eyes so hard he saw spots, trying to focus his thoughts. “How the fuck do I even talk about this shit. Do I need to talk about the other weirdness in my life as Adrian? I would want them to talk to me but… Eurgh, fuck.”

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  The thoughts chased themselves around his head like a dog chasing its tail. He knew he would need to tell them he remembered his past life if he wanted to actually pursue either of them. His conscience wouldn’t accept anything else, but that didn’t stop the worry that it would hurt them that he had hidden something from them or that it might lead to them deciding to walk away.

  Staring at the gaps in the branches above, at the occasional wink of moonlight through the cloud cover, Eres just let the thoughts tumble. He knew himself well enough to know he would tell them, and soon. He wouldn’t be able to help it now that he didn’t have the pressure of being in a noble house around the whole time, not to mention the eavesdroppers. His mum, back when he was Adrian, had always said that sometimes you just had to bite the bullet.

  Bite the bullet and do the damn thing, and then keep on going, that’s all life is. Eres smiled as he could almost hear her voice echo through his head. Truthfully, he tried not to think about her too much these days. It was too hard, wondering how she held up after his death. He still missed her, but it had been a long time since he had thought of her advice. Too long, probably. She always did give good advice, no matter what he threw at her.

  Guess I should follow your advice on this one too, he thought, smiling up at the sky. Might not be in your world anymore, Mum, but you’re going to help me make a mark on this one, at least.

  “Soon then, in the next town,” Eres spoke softly but aloud, hoping it would give him more courage. “I can get them a gift, tell them about Adrian and see how they react to that. Once that is done, I can start to deal with the other stuff.”

  The second he spoke the words aloud, it was like his mind quieted. Now he had a way forward, a plan; it wasn’t as stressful. Good advice, Mum, Eres thought with a smile. He stood from his perch, prodding at a knot in his lower back from where he had hunched on the rock to draw and think. He let out a little grumble of pain as he pushed into it before he felt the pain start to ease. He felt warmth flow through his body, and all the aches and pains from the afternoon’s walk faded without a trace.

  “If you had told me you were sore, I could have done that before I went to sleep.” Freya’s voice was soft and clear, but there was a hint of reproach hidden under it. Eres looked over his shoulder and had to stop his jaw from falling open.

  She really was beautiful. Her hair had been let down to sleep and fell in dark waves around her shoulders, framing the paleness of her face and highlighting the bright green of her eyes. His gaze darted down to the soft swell of her lips and remembered his sketch of them earlier. He hadn’t done them justice, they looked far softer than they had on his page. Though they were slightly pouting in annoyance currently.

  “Ah,” Eres said dumbly, trying to pull blood back up to his brain, “Um, honestly it wasn’t bothering me until now. Otherwise, I would have said, I promise. Guess I am still used to Brom wanting me not to heal when I'm sore so that muscle builds.”

  “Well, get out of the habit,” Freya grumbled, moving closer and putting her hand against the area the knot had been. “We all need to be healthy. Training your body can wait until we are out of the woods and somewhere safe. Alright?”

  “Alright, Freya.” Eres laughed, bumping her shoulder with his own. “Thanks for looking after me.”

  She sat down on the rock that he had been perched on, throwing another log onto the fire. “Alright, anything I need to look out for? No? Go get some sleep; one of us will wake you in the morning.”

  As soon as the words left her mouth, Eres felt his eyes begin to droop. It felt like sand was in them with how gritty and heavy they felt. He nodded at her and mumbled out a barely intelligible thanks before he stumbled to his own tent. His face impacted the bedroll a little harder than he had intended, but he was already asleep before he could feel the pain.

  ***

  Freya watched Eres stumble into his tent with a smile. She hadn’t heard most of his conversation with himself, but she had caught a few snippets as she was waking up. She could tell he was finally close to making a decision, and she had caught the word gift. She wondered what he would get for Myla. The poor girl was so nervous around him these days, and a gift would go a long way to making her feel sure he wanted her around.

  She reached out with her Divine Power and settled it around the camp. It would warn her if anything moved in the area, and it settled like a fine web of gold through the air. Angel Dust, Eres calls it, she remembered. It brought a smile to her face, but she wasn’t feeling very angelic. She was feeling frustrated.

  She knew why Eres was hesitating; she could tell what he was worried about, and she wasn’t about to push him and force a decision, but by the gods, the wait was a struggle. She had waited half her life already, and waiting any longer felt like torture. But she would be patient. He was worth the wait.

  Glancing at the bag to her side, she saw the edge of a book poking out of the bag. She nearly picked it up, nearly sated her curiosity on what new things he was working on. She loved to watch him draw. She just loved to watch him, but he always looked so calm when he was drawing, so peaceful.

  She pushed the book deeper into the bag and closed the flap over it, pushing back the temptation. She would just have to be patient. She would have to wait. Her eyes flicked over to Myla’s tent, thinking about her shy friend. She would need to be patient with both of them, but at least one of them already knew her plans. All she would need is a little nudge.

  Freya leaned back and watched the sky begin to brighten through the gap in the trees, a wide smile on her face as she thought about what the future would bring.