Chapter 001: Foolish Tian Er

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  It is said that the Supreme Elder Lord has a rare book called "Shenzhuan Ce", which records the essence of astrology, divination, physiognomy, fortune-telling, Feng Shui, omens, and Qimen Dunjia.

  Even Zhang Daoling, the world-renowned Heavenly Master, had been yearning for it for a long time and begged for it in every way, but had never seen it.

  The Taoist boy who burns the stove for Taishang Laojun is called 'Kugu', he was originally a million-year-old white bone demon, and finally was subdued by this old man.

  One day, suddenly.

  Ku Bone intends to give up the promising career of burning pot furnace, wants to start a new stove, and has also moved his mind on "Shen Ce"!

  Just as a horse-riding monkey burst out of the alchemy furnace and caused chaos in the palace, he took advantage of the opportunity to steal the "Divine Calculation Strategy" and escape elsewhere.

  The Supreme Elder Lord was furious upon learning of this, and summoned the Wind Whisperer and the Thousand-Mile Eye to investigate the whereabouts of the withered skeleton. In the end, he used the Vajra Cudgel to strike the withered skeleton until its soul scattered, and also retrieved the "Divine Calculation Strategy"!

  Just as the old man was overjoyed and felt grateful, he unexpectedly discovered that "The Divine Calculation Strategy" ... was missing one-third of it!

  ……

  Let's turn back the clock to 1994.

  In those years.

  People only know 'apple' is used for eating.

  'Furong sister' has not yet learned how to be cute.

  'Phoenix Sister' might just be a simple and kind-hearted older sister.

  The gangsters walking on the main street, looking at them with today's eyes, are all quite 'sharp'. At that time, their weapon of choice was not a mobile phone, but a more affordable brick.

  Jiangnan is a great place, with beautiful mountains and rivers, and even more beautiful people!

  Sorry, our hero didn't have such good luck and was living in a small mountain village in the north, living a humble and unknown life.

  He has a certain reputation, even in the surrounding villages of 'Kao Shan Cun', people know him and have given him a nickname...'Sha Tian Er'.

  Only Old Xu, who spent his days with him, would call him by his name 'Yi Tian'.

  It was in the midst of a cold winter, and the weather in the north was unusually cold. The biting wind cut through the pedestrians on the streets like a knife.

  Under the old locust tree in Kaishan Village, a young man under the age of 18 was sitting on a stone bench. Unlike ordinary people, his eyes had little spirit and stared motionlessly ahead, but there was nothing in front of him, just an ordinary mud wall.

  His whole person looked pale and thin, but between his eyebrows he could still see a few points of handsomeness. A thick green military coat was wrapped around his body, and he wore a black earmuff hat. Two facial moles had been frozen red, and the runny nose had frozen solid. Fortunately, due to the cold weather, it froze quickly; otherwise, he would have had an extra meal today.

  Occasionally, a few walking women saw Yi Tian and chattered, "This kid is pitiful enough. He didn't have parents since he was young and was picked up by the kind old man Xu to raise him. Who would have thought that such an accident would occur!"

  "Yes, although he's usually mischievous and troublesome, his heart is in the right place. How did he become so foolish?"

  "It's lucky that he's still alive, wandering around on a stormy day without getting struck by lightning is a big deal!"

  "Alas, it's been half a year now, looks like he won't be getting better..."

  That night, when something happened to Yitian, it was raining heavily, with thunder and lightning. He originally wanted to go to the small grocery store in the village to buy soy sauce, but when he passed by the bathhouse, he ran into his dream lover Ali walking in.

  This Ali is not a celestial being, she is three years older than Yi Tian, with phoenix eyes, round waist, duck buttocks, and a short, stout body. Her skin is quite fair, her thick lips look very sexy, and there's a beauty mole on her face that's almost as big as a quail egg!

  Even with such an appearance, in the village it is considered a noble and elegant presence.

  Ali usually makes eyes at Yitian every day, and the innocent boy can't bear it. Several times, Yitian dreamed of Ali in his dreams, and in his subconscious mind, he mistakenly thought he had fallen in love with her.

  Just on this day, Yi Tian carried the psychology of studying human body aesthetics, came to the wall hole of the women's bathhouse that only he knew, and was about to go up and take a look when suddenly disaster struck from the sky!

  A bolt of lightning came down from the sky and struck him squarely on the head!

  And that's how it ended up like this!

  In the depths of winter, the sky darkened very early. At the entrance of the village, there was a fifty-year-old mountain goat-like old man with a fashionable middle parting in his hair, looking benevolent and kind-hearted. People who didn't know him would have thought he was an erudite old scholar. His black cotton-padded jacket had been patched countless times, but it was spotlessly clean.

  He held a bottle of Erguotou in his left hand and a catty of pork in his right, hurrying towards the village with an urgent look on his face.

  Someone saw him and asked: "Old Xu, it seems that you made a lot of money today by fortune-telling, buying so many good things!"

  Old Xu laughed and said: "Haha, you really figured it out! Today's business is not bad, all of this is for my family's silly kid. By the way, do you want to calculate a fortune today? I'll give you an 80% discount!"

  "Alright, you're wrong nine times out of ten!"

  "Haha, just right, I calculated nine today and none of them were accurate!"

  “……”

  What Old Xu said was actually true, he got nine out of ten wrong, but the only one he got right was Yi Tian.

  When he was young, he had calculated for Yi Tian, and after many verifications, he came to a very distressing conclusion, that is, Yi Tian would not live beyond the age of 18!

  Because Yi Tian was picked up, he didn't know the specific time of his birthday, but Old Man Xu felt that Yi Tian's 18th birthday was approaching, and whether he could pass this hurdle or not only heaven knew!

  So he has been coming back very early recently and always buys delicious food for Yitian, even though he himself is not willing to eat it. He still gives everything he can give to Yitian.

  He has regarded Yitian as his own flesh and blood, although Yitian often gets into trouble and angers him, he never takes it to heart.

  Seeing Yi Tian still sitting on the stone bench in a daze, Old Xu also felt at ease. He had also taken Yi Tian to the county town for treatment, but the doctor gave a definite reply that Yi Tian's brain had suffered severe stimulation and was likely incurable.

  Hearing this news made Old Xu extremely heartbroken. After researching extensively, every day when he went out, he would bring Yi Tian to this cold stone bench, and at night when he returned, he would give Yi Tian a high dose of Erguotou (a type of Chinese liquor). He planned to use the hot and cold therapy to stimulate Yi Tian's nerves and help him recover as soon as possible.

  Although it's heart-wrenching, this is the best treatment method he could think of.

  Facing Yi Tian with a warm smile, Old Man Xu said: "Youngster, let's go, we're heading home!"

  Xu old man's not-so-strong body directly carried the 1.8-meter tall Yi Tian on his back, trudging through the snowy ground with a 'creaking' sound.

  As they walked, Old Xu still didn't forget to chat with Yi Tian, "You little stinker, don't think I don't know why you appeared at the bathhouse that day. If you want to take a peek at someone's daughter, you should choose a better time!"

  "Alas, it's strange that I said so, that day shouldn't have let you go out, this is good, a thunderstorm hit and turned you into this."

  "I don't know if you can hear me now, but I'm telling you, you must get through this. This year is a big hurdle for you. Don't be disbelieving, I've calculated it for you. You only have 18 years of life left. If you make it past 18, your future will be incredibly prosperous! Haha, at that time, I'll also bask in the glory with you!"

  At this point, Old Man Xu's body trembled and he choked back a sob. He himself didn't believe that Yi Tian's situation would really take a turn for the better. Moreover, Yi Tian's divination showed that it was an unsolvable dead end!

  This means that Yi Tian's death is beyond doubt!

  Seemingly sensing Old Man Xu's sorrowful emotions, a teardrop rolled down Yi Tian's eyes.

  Due to Old Man Xu's limited income, his home was quite dilapidated. The walls were made of mud and straw, with one side having a large hole in it. Fortunately, the village customs were simple and honest, so he didn't worry about being robbed, not that there was anything worth stealing anyway.

  Push open the black wooden gate, it's a courtyard of over 20 square meters. The courtyard is surrounded by the main house, east wing and warehouse, all made of mud and grass, with many cracks already appearing. On top of the houses are pieces of black tiles. Without the noise of the outside world, this place has lost much of its vitality.

  Yi Tian was put in the east wing, Old Man Xu lit the fire on the stove and patted his head, saying: "Silly boy, are you hungry? I'll go cook your favorite braised pork, and we'll have a good drink together!"

  Yi Tian was put on the kang, and then Old Xu turned around and left.

  At this moment, Yi Tian's subconscious mind shouted: "Don't worry, old man, I will definitely make it through the 18th year!"

  Then he scolded a broken soul in the sea of recognition: "Are you done yet? You've been chasing me for half a year!"

  ……

  P.S: When reading a book, it's best not to drink or eat anything, the next story will definitely make you laugh out loud! Vote for me... What are you still hesitating about, hurry up and come over!

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