“By the way,” Gojo said, eyes narrowing behind those ridiculous blindfolds, “you’ve been awfully quiet up there, stowaway.”

  That smirk tugged at the corner of Gojo’s mouth again.

  “I don’t know who—or what—you are. Yet. But don’t get too comfortable. This kid might be your ride, but I’m the one driving the route.”

  I made a little eye and mouth appear on Yuji’s back. Upon doing so, some very odd visuals appeared over Gojo and Megumi, each being different colours. That’s new. “I had a feeling you noticed. I would’ve hated having you as my dad. Not because you stink, but because it’d be impossible to hide my stash of Hentai from you.”

  Gojo froze. Not because he was scared—but because this wasn’t in the goddamn handbook.

  Megumi, on the other hand, felt differently. “You’re not Sukuna. Who are you?”

  “You can call me Dylan, Dylan Mason, or Mason Dylan as it’d go in Japanese. Oh, and for the record,” I shifted my gaze at Gojo. “when Four-Eyes told Yuji that he was ‘going to make him and the Parasite pay’, he was actually talking about me. He respects you far too much to give you a nickname even after you bodied him, and he loves me too much to have even asked for my name before giving me a nickname.” I felt a surge of irritation from Sukuna, but he didn’t respond openly.

  “How long were you even there?” Megumi asked.

  “Long enough to have seen his face go Tomato Red after he admitted he goes to the Occult Club to the Nurse over the Phone. And no, he doesn’t know about me, and yes, I’m giving him a nickname. ‘Reddy’ is already taken. So ‘Pinky’ will do.”

  “None of that answers the que—”

  “Anyway, so what’s it to ya’?”

  Gojo hummed. “So does that mean you were here before Sukuna?”

  “Ehh, basically.” If we don’t count the sealed finger. “Kept to myself. Wasn’t sure how he’d react.” Even if I could directly interact with him without causing damage.

  He raised a brow, like he was deciding whether to poke me with a stick or dropkick me into a volcano. “Alright, smart mouth—literally—talk. You say you were already here before Sukuna’s finger went down the hatch?”

  The eye behind his blindfold narrowed.

  "To be frank, I’m not quite sure how I ended up here of all places. And honestly, I wish I had a Body of my own. Well, I did, but piggybacking is much more fun. Although it is quite crowded here with not just two, but three souls. Even more so when one of them has a pretty severe case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder."

  Another mouth appeared on Yuji’s back, and it was Sukuna's. "The Hell's that supposed to mean, Punk-Ass?"

  I only snickered in response. "Since I called you a Narcissistic Warlord earlier, you probably know what it means intuitively. But since you asked nicely, I’ll give you the exact definition. ‘Narcissism is a Mental Illness where all those affected usually hold a grandiose sense of self, as a defence mechanism stemming from deep-seated insecurity’. I’d say that describes you perfectly. And tonight removed any lingering doubts about the insecurity part of it." I finished with a teasing smile.

  Sukuna snarled. "Why, you..."

  "It's okay Four-Eyes. You feel touched and you can't process it, so your defense mechanism when your ego gets poked is to get Mad."

  "I Hate You."

  “Really? Didn’t realize that the first time you said it.”

  “Smartass.” Sukuna hissed.

  Gojo stood still for a moment, mouth slightly ajar like he just watched a raccoon drive a car. Then Gojo wheeze-laughed. Loud. Slapped his knee like an old man watching slapstick.

  “Ohhh my god. This is the best thing that’s happened all month. I’m so glad I came today. You two are like an old married couple. An entertaining one at that.”

  Yuji, still unconscious, let out a little snore. Me and Sukuna, meanwhile, were still jawing it out from opposite sides of his back like a cursed comedy routine. And Gojo was eating this up like popcorn at a funeral.

  “You—Dylan—are giving Four-Eyes here an existential meltdown and I am absolutely here for it,” Gojo said, putting a hand to his heart like it was a spiritual experience. “No wonder he can’t take over his body. Yuji’s got two freeloaders living rent-free in his skull—one's an ancient war crime with a god complex and no body, the other’s a shit-stirrer who kicks the hornets' nest with a metaphorical bee-keeping suit.”

  Then he squatted down to eye-level with the side of Yuji’s face, chin resting on his knuckles. “Alright, Dylan. Let’s say I don’t exorcise you right now. Hypothetically. You’re stuck in here, right? No way out?”

  “Not unless you wanna build me a body and figure out how to install a soul into it,” I shot back.

  Gojo nodded slowly. “Tempting. I always wanted to play Frankenstein. But I’ve got, like… a backlog of eldritch bullshit to deal with first.”

  Sukuna growled again, low and guttural. “You’ll regret not killing him now, Sorcerer.”

  Gojo didn’t even blink. “You’re just saying that, because you’re a little self-conscious right now.”

  Then he turned his head back toward my little eye and mouth. “Okay, final question—for now. You’re snarky, you’re mouthy, you’re clearly Sukuna’s Public Enemy #1. So tell me this, Dylan...”

  Gojo leaned in, serious now.

  “Are you a threat to my student?”

  Because that was the line. I could joke all day. But Gojo Satoru only played around until you crossed the one thing he actually cared about.

  I hummed, giving Gojo a knowing smile. "Oh, so you're already claiming the Pink Haired Dork now? So, I'm going to be honest, and say that I'm going to have way too much fun roasting his ass to actually want him dead, or anything like that. Plus, if he dies, I die too. So the answer would be a hard no."

  Sukuna couldn't let that line go unchallenged. "Please, just do me a favour. I can awake in some other Era, preferably without some other dipshit in the same body as me."

  Megumi, who’s been awfully quiet until now, finally spoke up. “On second thought, maybe it would be best to—”

  “Nah.” Gojo cut in. “This is way too entertaining to let it end this quickly. Anyway, it sounds to me that the two of you are perfect for each other—Yuji’s stuck with a walking natural disaster, and you’re stuck with someone too dumb to know when to shut up. Karma really is a bitch.”

  Sukuna’s voice, razor-sharp and pissed, echoed from Yuji’s back again.

  “Stop lumping me in with this little clown.”

  I cooed. “Aww. Did I hurt your fragile ego again, Four-Eyes?”

  “You keep talking like that and I’ll rip you out of this body with my bare hands.”

  “Joke’s on you,” I grinned wider. “I don’t have a body and neither do you. So good luck with that one champ.”

  Gojo. “Alright, alright. I’m putting both of you in verbal time-out before I start charging rent for all this drama in my brainspace.”

  “Please.” Megumi expressed.

  “Alright, since you asked nicely, ‘Mr-cool-guy-in-a-blind-fold’, I will oblige.” My little eye and mouth then receded, with Sukuna following suit after muttering something derogatory under his breath, as Gojo carried the unconscious Yuji over his shoulder.

  After receding back to my Domain, I then crossed the veil to bug Sukuna more. "Hey Four-Eyes!” Sukuna froze, as he turned to face me with a massive scowl. “I hope you didn't take anything I said about you personally."

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  Sukuna stares daggers at me. "Go to Hell."

  I then point everywhere. "Already am. Anyways, how are you feeling about your fight with that Gojo dude? It must've been rough getting Bodied like that first thing the Great King of Curses woke up." Sukuna growls. "I mean hey, I get it, right now you feel embarrassed and self-conscious, 'cause it’s now official that you fell off. But hey, if it makes you feel any better, I know you'll make a comeback soo–"

  Sukuna snaps. "Why don't you just do me a favor, and shut the fuck up!?"

  I raised my hands in mock surrender.

  "Okay, okay. It was bad timing, shouldn't have poked at you when you were already Sour fr-" I didn't get to finish my sentence, as my head was sliced in half, and I collapsed onto the flooded ground with a splash. I laid in the water for a moment, before I got back up, and put the top of my head back on. "That was just Rude, man. I Never cut you off, while you're talking. Both literally, and metaphorically."

  Sukuna's eyes twitched. Sukuna’s upper lip curled like he was holding back a demonic fart and a tantrum at the same time.

  "You. Talk. Too. Much." Sukuna snarled, pacing now like some caged animal who just realized his cellmate brought a karaoke machine and an unlimited Red Bull subscription.

  "Well hey, someone's gotta carry the conversation," I shrugged. "Pinky’s unconscious, that Gojo dude’s probably memeing with whoever he annoys the most, which is probably that black haired guy, who speaking of which is probably off brooding somewhere like a Tumblr post come to life. You and me? We're the life of this haunted flesh-party."

  “You’re not funny,” Sukuna hissed.

  “Oh, I don’t have to be,” I smirked. “You’re the punchline. The ‘King of Curses’ who got his cheeks clapped within ten seconds of waking up. And by a guy who buys souvenir mochi before throwing hands.”

  Sukuna lunged again. This time it was a clean gut punch—ethereal, sure, but it still somehow knocked the wind out of me. My back cracked against the inner wall of Sukuna’s domain, but I wiped the blood off my chin with a grin anyway.

  "Alright, alright," I wheezed. "Damn. You pack a mean punch for someone with chronic 1v1 trauma."

  Sukuna stood in front of me, seething. “Mock me again, and I’ll make you wish I killed you properly.”

  “You and half the cast, Four-Eyes. Better get in line.” I said with a blood soaked grin as I was catching my breath.

  A beat. Sukuna's scowl deepened.

  “I Hate this Era,” he spat, before turning around to walk over to his throne. “Now get out.” He ordered, before muttering under his breath. “Too many annoying clowns. Not enough blood.”

  “And yet,” I called after him after wiping the blood off of my chin, “you still somehow ended up with the circus inside your own damn head.”

  Sukuna stopped yet again, and turned to look at me. And oh boy, if looks could kill, I’d have been erased from existence a hundred times over, before turning back around to try ignoring me again. And then failing again.

  But hey—what’s life without a little death wish?

  "Besides, if it makes you feel any better, I'll only come back here to bug you when I'm bored. But, your only solace is that I don't get too bored all that often.... Normally. So, I'll only pop in once a while. Besides that, it'll be like I'm not even here."

  Sukuna froze mid-step, spine tensing like a loaded spring. Then he turned his head slowly—too slowly—like a cursed animatronic at the end of its patience.

  “Oh, wonderful,” Sukuna said, voice dripping with venom. “So not only am I imprisoned in the body of some Brat, but now I’ve got a second Asswipe setting up camp in my mind like it’s a fucking summer resort.”

  I gave him two thumbs up and the smuggest grin humanly—or parasitically—possible. “Exactly. Think of me as your emotional support gremlin. Keeps you grounded. Keeps you spicy. Anyway, I’m gonna get going now. So feel free to visit any time. Hope you're not claustrophobic.” I said with a grin, before I stepped through the veil into my own domain. Then I paused, and decided to poke my head through the veil. "Oh by the way, I already checked, and there's no locking mechanism for this, so anyone can go in or out. Buh-bye!" I winked before receding.

  Sukuna stared at the now-solid wall like it had personally insulted his legacy. Sukuna just stood there, still as a statue, eyes twitching in perfect sync with the vein bulging on his temple. The silence was almost reverent—until Sukuna finally muttered to himself:

  “…This is Hell. Not metaphorically. Literally. I’ve been trapped in a clown car full of maggots.”

  Sukuna stormed back toward his throne of bones and obsidian, every step like a curse slamming into the ground. “‘No locking mechanism’, he says. That little shit’s got a goddamn open door to my soul…”

  Sukuna dropped into the throne with a heavy scowl, arms draped over the sides like a jaded demon king mid-existential crisis.

  “…Claustrophobic? I wish I were. Maybe then I wouldn’t be aware of how infinite this stupidity is.”

  Somewhere, muffled behind the closed veil, a yelling, cheery voice echoed faintly:

  “Miss me yet~?”

  Sukuna let out a deep exhale through gritted teeth, before letting out a bitter laugh. “…Keep Talking Parasite. I will remember each Word, each Insult, each time you subjected me to your Mockery, and repay you — with Interest.” Sukuna quietly promised to himself, before the only sound left was the ambience of his Inner-World, and whatever he’s thinking at any given moment.

  Yuji woke up to a familiar smooth voice in a candle-lit room. “Good Morning.”

  Yuji raised his head with a groan, and looked around the room before focusing in on Gojo who was sitting directly across from Yuji.

  “So, which one of the three are you right now?” Gojo asked.

  “Hey, wait. Aren’t you…”

  “Gojo Satoru. I’m one of the Teachers at Jujutsu High.”

  “Jujutsu… Fushiguro… Where is he? Huh?” Yuji pulled, but was yanked back by the rope he was restrained by. “What the hell?”

  “I wouldn’t be worrying about other people at the moment, Itadori Yuji. You see, it’s been decided that you’re to be executed”

  Gojo recapped the fight he had with Sukuna, as well as the parts Yuji missed (up until the part where Gojo acknowledged my presence).

  “But, the end result is still your execution.”

  "Your recap doesn’t… Wait, you said that there’s three of us?"

  A mouth emerged on Yuji’s right cheek. “I was wondering when you’d finally clock that.” I said as an eye appeared between the little mouth and Yuji’s right eye. “But, you’re not exactly the brightest tool in the shed, now are you?” I said with a teasing smirk.

  “Who are you, and why do you have a western sounding accent?”

  “I’m your other Hitchhiker. But you can call me Dylan Mason, or Mason Dylan, as it would be in Japanese. But just ‘Dylan’ works fine.”

  “Where did you even come from? I only ate the old finger.”

  “That’s the big mystery, isn’t it?” I said, feigning ignorance. “Truth be told, I don’t quite know how I even ended up here myself, but if it means that I get to Eat You, I’m all for it.” I said with a manical smile. All to evade giving any real answer while also changing the subject in a way that I know will make Yuji uncomfortable.

  Yuji winced. “You’re going to Eat Me?!”

  I chuckled. “Well, now that I say it out-loud that sounds really Gay. So on second-thought, I might have to pass on that. Though, I’m sure Four-Eyes will beg to differ.” I said with a toothy grin.

  We both felt a surge of irritation. “What the Hell did you just say, Parasite?” Sukuna said internally.

  I let out an obnoxious giggle that you’d normally hear from a six-year-old who knows they’re stirring the pot. “Oh yeah, and there’s my nickname. I’m the guy Four-Eyes called ‘Parasite’ last night, just before the cool dude in the blindfold knocked you out.”

  Yuji was quiet for a moment, before Gojo chimed in. “It’s true. He and Sukuna started literally bickering on your back after I acknowledged his presence within you. Sukuna really loves that guy.”

  “Mmm-hmm.” I affirmed.

  “How long were you even… ya’know, here?” Yuji asked cautiously, fearing that he already knew the answer.

  “Long enough to know your face went red when you openly admitted to going to the Occult Club to the Nurse over the Phone.” I answered with a teasing grin. “And in case you’re wondering why you did, yeah… that was probably me.”

  Yuji paused, before the realization hit him. His face turned red again, after reliving that embarrassing memory. “That was you?!”

  “That’s basically what I just said.” I answered curtly.

  “You know, I could’ve said I was in the track team. Or the volleyball team.”

  I chuckled. “And miss out on witnessing you getting embarrassed? No way. Plus, now she thinks you’re the fun kind of weirdo. You’re welcome.”

  Gojo clapped his hands. "Ladies, can I have your attention please.”

  I giggled. “My bad. Didn’t mean to derail.”

  “So, I'll explain it from the top. Yuji, I managed to convince the Higher Ups to suspend your execution, in exchange for you absorbing all of Sukuna’s Fingers, before you’re executed." Gojo pulls one of Sukuna's Fingers out from his pocket. "Yuji, this is another one of Sukuna’s fingers. There are 20 of these in total. We possess Six of Them."

  "Twenty? Oh, each Finger and Toe?"

  Gojo shook his head. "No, Sukuna also had four arms." Gojo tossed it in the air and blasted it towards the wall. It was very clearly undamaged. "As you can see, we can't destroy them. The Curse is just that powerful. And, the Curse grows stronger everyday. So, our modern-day Jujutsu seals just aren't keeping up. That's where you come in." He says, pointing at Yuji.

  "Huh?"

  Gojo explains. "When you die, the Curse inside you will die as well."

  I interjected. "Yeah, just... Don't do that while I'm still here. Because then I'll die too."

  Sukuna then chimed in. "All the more reason to."

  "Can you not, you two? I'm still trying to talk to Yuji here."

  "Yeah, sure sure. He's still a bit sour from earlier, but we'll continue this in Pinky's Head. Carry on." I receded, and Yuji's right cheek returned to normal.

  “Did he just call me ‘Pinky’?”

  "And you too, Four-Eyes." Gojo said expectantly.

  "I will kill you both when I get out of here." Yuji's left cheek returned to normal as well.

  "To answer your question, yeah, Dylan did just call you ‘Pinky’. Now, where was I? Ah yes, you see, our Elders are Cowards." Gojo says, probably with a certain Kyoto Principal in mind as he finishes that sentence. "They're demanding we kill you right away. But that would be a waste, wouldn't you say?"

  "A Waste?"

  Gojo nodded. "See, there's no assurance another vessel capable of handling Mr.Four-Eyes will ever be born again." I felt Sukuna's irritation spike. Looks like the nickname I gave him has stuck. "So, here's what I proposed to them: since they've already decided to execute you, why not wait until you've absorbed all of Sukuna to do it? And the Higher-Ups Agreed. So, now, you have Two Options before you. You can die here and now, or gather all the parts of Sukuna, absorb them, and then die."

  Yuji sat there to contemplate, as a Muffled, Grumpy Voice was carried across the veil. “I really Fucking Hate you, Parasite.”

  I yawned. “Yeah.” I agreed.

  “Yeah?” Sukuna repeated, taken-a-back at how nonchalant my reply was.

  “What else did you want me to say? ‘I Hate you too’?”

  “Can you guys stop? You’ve been talking non-stop.” Yuji asked out loud.

  “No!” Sukuna barked.

  “Sure. Kinda bored of this back-and-fourth anyway.” I said with a sly grin that said otherwise.

  Yuji exhaled, before thinking about it to weigh his options, as well as even thinking of his Grandfather’s last words to him. His dying wish. “Alright, I’ll absorb them all.”

  Gojo nodded approvingly. “Good choice. Come with me… after I untie the rope.”