My computer is already a little better than before. At least now I no longer feel frustrated just to open a new tab in the browser or type a few paragraphs without having to wait for a few seconds of annoying g. However, even though there is an improvement in performance compared to the first time I used this machine to access a website that turned out to be a trap, it still can't compare to the computer I knew in my first life.

  I'm still limited to simple tasks. Running a heavy program? Never mind. Multitasking with multiple software running simultaneously? Impossible. Even just to open a simple text editor, there's sometimes a few seconds of g that reminds me that this device is still a potato computer in every aspect.

  But now, I can't compin too much. I have a new job. My new task-or rather, the "hobby" I'd created for myself so as not to die of boredom-was to create and develop a video game. It sounded simple, but once I actually started facing it I quickly realized that it was a much longer and troublesome job than I expected.

  I don't know of any game development software here. No Unr*al Eng*ne, no Un*ty, even something simpler like R*G Ma*er I'm not sure exists here. Even worse, I don't even know any programming nguages in this world.

  This meant I had to start from scratch. Literally. And I hate this.

  Since the beginning, I've always hated science and all its products. I never had any interest in academia, never had any interest in pure science, let alone something that required a technical approach like programming. To me, science was just a tool to get a high-paying job; if not for that, I would never have touched it.

  However, being unemployed is worse than having to face something I hate.

  So, I'll do it with certain restrictions.

  I won't waste my time creating multiple programming nguages. I will only create one programming nguage, powerful enough to handle video game development, but not necessarily having the flexibility for multiple applications.

  Not only to save time from lingering in this godforsaken pce of science, creating too many programming nguages will only make things inefficient; as each programming nguage has its own function.

  For example, a programming nguage like Python eases the development process due to its simple and easy-to-learn syntax, but has slower performance compared to low-level nguages like C. JavaScript is excellent for web development, but not suitable for heavy system applications. C++ provides a bance between speed and flexibility, but is more difficult to learn compared to Python.

  If I create too many programming nguages, I will spend more time developing technology that should just be a hobby.

  I didn't need a nguage that was flexible for all purposes. I just needed one nguage that could handle what I needed: creating video games.

  The sooner I finish this, the sooner I can get out of this disgusting business called science.

  I found some basic programs on a couple of fsh drives that I managed to steal from Dante's b. Not much was useful for my project, but there was one thing that was quite helpful: a text editor.

  As trivial as it sounds, this is a huge improvement. Without a text editor, I'd have to code under much more torturous conditions. I would probably have to write everything manually on a piece of paper first before copying it into the computer, like a scientist in the 19th century trying to design an analytical machine.

  But now, I can type and edit code more easily. It doesn't solve my main problem, but it can at least shorten the processing time.

  Now, my priority is to create programming nguages and game engines from scratch.

  Everything reted to technical game development will fall under the scope of this project. It's not just about making a game-I have to build the entire foundation that will make the game possible.

  Fortunately, I didn't have to think about many other things that are often a burden for game developers. Because I didn't have the slightest intention of making this game look attractive.

  I'm bad at design.

  Even in my first life, I had no drawing skills at all. If there was a college assignment that required a presentation with illustrations, the only thing I could do was draw a stickman.

  So, there are no graphics in this game. There are no textures. No 3D models. No advanced visual effects. All will be as simple as possible, simpler than a collection of retro games of the past.

  I also won't bother making music or sound effects. If someone thinks that video games need soundtracks to build atmosphere, I don't care. This game will be completely silent.

  By ignoring all these design elements, I could focus entirely on the most fundamental part of the game: the behind-the-scenes systems.

  Actually, creating a programming nguage for games is quite common. Most modern game engines are built with a simir structure. For example, Godot's core game engine was created using C++, but the scripting system from the game developer's side uses GDScript, Godot's own nguage.

  I will apply a simir approach. The programming nguage for creating the game engine, and the game maker inside will use the same programming nguage instead of using other programming nguages (because I don't know any other kind of programming nguage in this world).

  I named this programming nguage "Bitter", the name felt appropriate.

  First, because it sounds like "bit", which is the most basic unit in a computing system.

  Secondly, because this was my first hobby-a hobby that felt bittersweet. Something I did not out of love or pleasure, but because I hated being idle even more.

  Building a programming nguage from scratch is not something that can be done in a day, there are many components to work on.

  I need compilers and interpreters so that the code can be executed; I need text editors and IDEs that allow one to write code more efficiently; then there is syntax and semantics-the rules of how the nguage should be written and interpreted; parsers and lexers must be built so that the code can be parsed and transted into machine-understandable instructions.

  I started by building a lexer and parser, both of which are the foundation of a programming nguage.

  My little fingers deftly grazed the keyboard keys with mesmerizing speed, as if I were participating in a keyboarding contest.

  While I typed away in the closet endlessly, my mind sometimes drifted in other directions.

  For example, Anna.

  I don't know what's wrong with her logical thinking, her brain is too absurd and often feels upside down. One moment she could speak very maturely and sharply, but the next, she could do something really stupid. I used to think he was the most perfect human being in every way, but now I realize: he's just an ordinary human being with many fws.

  I went back to my code, Bitter's compiler was still a mess, so I tested it with a simple piece of code to see if it could recognize basic commands.

  Suddenly, I thought of Dante. Of all the people in this house, he was probably the few I could tolerate besides that strapping Buttler.

  Perhaps because he was eccentric and strange, I didn't feel the need to judge him or treat him in a defensive manner like I did the others. He was a mad scientist living in his own world, and somehow, that made me feel more rexed when dealing with him.

  I leaned against the wall of the cupboard, stopped typing and massaged my temples without ever realizing it while staring up at the ceiling... Now, Aurelia.

  When I think of Dante, his wife instinctively comes to mind.

  I have never asked to be reborn, this is a fact. I never asked for a second chance, nor did I ask for a new body, I never wanted another life. I never committed such a great sin that I had to be punished by being trapped in an existence that wasn't even mine to begin with. I never wanted to be a child again-living the innocence I never really felt, feeling the attention that felt so foreign, and more than anything, I never wanted to take a pce that was not mine.

  But here I am. Living, breathing, and walking on a world that shouldn't even know me.

  I could accept it, but that was it. I could tell myself that this was just another form of bad luck. That it wasn't my fault, that I wasn't to bme for something that happened against my will. I could convince myself that I was a victim of something unexpinable, something beyond the limits of human understanding. I could continue to live my life with that kind of thinking.

  But it all started to crumble... slowly, day by day, as I started seeing Aurelia more and more.

  I never really paid attention to her at first. To me, she was just part of the background of this new world, a stranger who happened to be in my life. She was the mother I didn't want, someone I could avoid as easily as I avoided other unimportant people in my life like before.

  But the more time passed, the more I realized something that should have been obvious from the start.

  He lost his son.

  Not because of an accident, not because of illness, not because of an unavoidable fate.

  But because of me.

  Because somehow, in an absurd process that even I couldn't understand, I had taken that pce.

  And that's something I can't change.

  I can ignore my own thoughts, I can deny them, I can say that it's not my fault. But the feeling remains.

  Every time I look at Aurelia, I can feel it gnawing at my insides. Every time I saw her empty eyes staring out of the window, every time I heard the sound of her heavy breathing as if the world was too painful for her, every time I saw how she smiled a little but was never really happy-I knew. I knew that I was the reason behind it all.

  At first, I could ignore it all, I could pretend that I didn't care, I could close my eyes and say that it was none of my business. But the longer it went on, the harder it became to ignore reality.

  I started to notice her. The way she stares bnkly at the backyard when everyone else is busy with their business. The way she refused to talk for too long with others, as if words were too heavy to come out of her mouth. The way she walked slowly through the hallway, as if her entire body was burdened by something that no one else could see.

  I never really talked to her. Not like I talked to Anna, or Dante, or even Butler. Every conversation we had was short, just a few sentences that sounded like pleasantries, like dialog that had to happen because circumstances forced us to.

  But I could feel it. I can feel how every word that comes out of her mouth has an inexplicable weight.

  I could feel it every time she looked at me. A gaze that should have been affectionate, should have been warm, but all I found was emptiness. Not hatred, not anger, not overwhelming sadness-but something worse than that.

  Admission.

  It was as if she had accepted the fact that her child was gone, that there was nothing she could do to change it, that I was in a pce that shouldn't be mine. It was as if she had accepted that I was a substitute. Not because she wanted me, not because she loved me, but because she had no other choice. And that's what hurts the most.

  I never wanted this, I never wanted to see her like that. I never wanted to be in this situation. But I can't leave, I can't disappear and bring back her son. I couldn't erase my own existence and fix everything that had happened. I was trapped.

  I can try not to care. I could try to move on with my life, find something to do, drown myself in work that would make me forget.

  But every time I saw her... Every time I heard her voice... Every time I realized that I was taking away something that couldn't be repced, I knew. No matter how hard I tried to ignore it, I had killed her child. This fact is something that I will never be able to erase from my mind.