Chapter Nineteen

  Sahara was quiet while we packed up camp the next morning. I’d tried to check on her after Finn and I took care of Arlo, but she’d sent me away without more than a word or two. Now, as we folded the tarps of the tents together, she wouldn’t meet my gaze.

  “I’m sorry about Arlo.” I said quietly. “I…” I wasn’t sure how to put my experience with him into words. Yeah, he was kind of an idiot. But he seemed like a decent person deep down, before he got corrupted by the Underneath. “I’m sorry it had to come to that.” I finally finished.

  Sahara took a shaky breath as she took the tarp from my hands and finished folding it. “Thank you.” She replied with little emotion in her voice while she set the folded tent cloths into the wagon. She dusted her hands against her blue cotton dress and stepped back, right as Finn came to join us. His sleeves were rolled up and sweat dripped from his curly hair onto his forehead. He looked as if he’d been carrying heavy cargo around since sunrise, which I found out wasn’t entirely wrong.

  “That’s the last of it.” he confirmed with a pant to Sahara, “V has all the luhix that was in those barrels now. You remember the meeting spot for Roland, right?” The question was directed at me now, and I snapped to attention.

  “Yeah, I remember. I’m supposed to set up a spot in a place called Terrin, and meet with him on the full moon. The ride will still take probably the majority of today.” I recalled the orders that came in the form of a letter from Roland. I’d yet to meet him face to face. Finn nodded, taking in the information.

  “Okay, you and Sahara take the cart then. I’ll follow behind on Lilly and meet you there.”

  I cast a side glance at Sahara, who was already walking towards the seats in the front. I looked back at Finn, who gave me a sympathetic smile, and a pat on the back. “Good luck with that one, mate.” I sighed and watched him walk away to his horse.

  This is going to be a long ride, I thought. Any suggestions? August pondered the question. Well, he began, clearly this man meant something to her. She’s probably feeling guilt for acting out of emotion. She hired you, which means she now associates you with that guilt. I know you can relate. I knew he was right, although I wasn’t sure what to do about it. I’d never felt guilty about a job before. I wasn’t sure where it was coming from, or how to handle it.

  Right, so what you’re telling me is that there is no right answer here. I concluded. August shrugged and answered, Maybe not yet, at least. I grunted my annoyance and joined Sahara in the front. She sat straight with a stiff posture, and stared at her hands in her lap. I settled into my seat and watched her for a moment, then shook my head slightly. No sense in making this more awkward than it needs to be. With a crack of the reins in my hand, we were off to Terrin.

  So how did you end up becoming my guide? I asked August as we rode, deciding talking to him was better than sitting in silence. Did you have to die first, or were you always on the Celestial Planes?

  I’ve always been on the Celestial Planes, not necessarily this one. I was born a celestial, many many years ago. Most magic-wielding fae will inherit some sort of guardian or advisory when they are old enough to hone their magic. Some choose to block it out or ignore it, some follow them blindly as part of their religion.

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  My mouth opened slightly as I came to realize something. Does that mean Gia has one too? I asked, though I didn’t want to get my hopes up. August hesitated before responding, She did, yes. She hasn’t used her magic, though. Not since before the massacre. We can’t guide what isn’t there. The connection between you and I is so strong because of how strong the magic flows in you. Your sister does not possess that skill. It made sense, but I was still a little disappointed. I see.

  I sighed deeply and stared at the sky, where the dark clouds were rolling in on the cold wind. I looked to my right to see Sahara staring at me, but she quickly broke her eye contact and looked out at the road. “What are you thinking about?” She finally spoke for the first time since that morning.

  I gave her a sad half-smile. “My sister,” I answered truthfully. “Giabella.” I watched as Sahara relaxed a bit, letting her shoulders drop and her palms rest in her lap. She shifted so that she was facing me, and I glanced frequently between her and the road ahead.

  “Tell me about her.” Sahara requested. When I didn’t speak right away, she put her hand on my arm. “Please. I need something to focus on.”

  That much I could understand. I lost myself in those bright blue eyes for a brief moment before turning my head to face the road again. “Well, I don’t know how entertaining it’ll be for you, but I can do my best.” I was very aware of her hand remaining on my arm as I began my story.

  “Giabella is my twin sister. She’s bright, smart, beautiful. She could’ve had any male in the village, yet she hadn’t chosen a single suitor.” I laughed. “That didn’t stop them from trying, though. They asked me what the secret was to her heart. They brought her gifts of all kinds, telling stories of how they’d risked life and limbs to get them for her. She accepted them all, she had a thing for jewels, but never let anyone get too close to her.”

  I was genuinely smiling as I thought back to our time as young teens. I hated it in the caves, but Gia was always a light for me. “She would do anything for a precious metal or jewel. She once picked a fight with a fae twice my size over a necklace. I had to break his nose to get it back.”

  Sahara covered her mouth with her hand to stifle a giggle. “That’s very noble of you.”

  “She’s my sister.” I shrugged. “After mother…” I hesitated, then cleared my throat, “After mother died, our father left. I made a promise I’d look after her. Even if it meant taking down giants.”

  I watched Sahara’s expression soften hearing me talk about my parents. “And then?” She asked, trying not to be pushy, but clearly curious.

  “When…” I tried to figure out a way to lay everything out delicately. “When our home was raided, we were forced to flee. What few people were left of us rebuilt in a safe place. And, well, safe to say I hated it. I hated it every day. After about five years of not hearing from our father, I decided I wanted to find him. I needed to know what happened to him. That’s what I told myself, at least. I haven’t got any closer to finding him. I’ve hardly even tried.” I shook my head.

  “Anyway, I wouldn’t let Gia come with me. She barely had enough magic to light a candle, let alone protect herself. I tried to leave in the night, and she caught me. We had a big fight. She… told me I would be dead to her. And that’s the last time I saw her.” I gripped the leather strips tighter in my hands to keep my emotions in check. When I looked over at Sahara, the emotions were swirling in her eyes.

  “I’m sorry.” She said quietly. “That must be really hard for you.”

  “I manage.” I replied. “You remind me of her, quite a bit. You’re both so much like my mother.”

  “That’s a good thing, I hope.” Sahara blushed, tucking her hands back into her lap and staring at them.

  I gave her a small, heartfelt smile and reached for her hand. “A very good thing. My mother was the most amazing woman. To be anything near her likeness is a high honor.”

  She took my hand and I gave it a small squeeze. “I hope I can live up to her reputation, then.” We held eye contact for a moment, and I started to lose myself in those ocean-blues again. Only this time, I started to consider it wouldn’t be such a bad thing to get lost for a while.