Cell injection completed. Beginning take over of host immune system… replacing micro biome…

  That’s the words that pop up on my HUD to signify the most important step on my quest is finally finished.

  ‘Now I can finally show those stupid mother fuck- focus.’

  “Hey Zee, now that that’s finished can you start upgrading our body, focus on repairing the nerves first if you please.”

  I have been doing that as was discussed earlier, please don’t get lost in your own head so soon.

  ‘Pfft. Lost in my own head, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t. It’s better in here than it has ever been out there. That will change soon. So very soon.’

  Wiping a happy tear from my face, I get back to being lost in my own head with plans so I can ignore the incredible amount of itching I’m now feeling in my legs.

  ‘Who knew walking again would be so close. First thing I’m going to do is run, I don’t care where but I’m going to run until I physically can’t anymore. Until I physically can’t anymore, hah, maybe I’ll be the first person to put themselves back in a wheelchair by running. Okay back to the list-

  -Learn how to program – done

  -AI research - done

  -Create AI – done now done ^expand for 2048 more done

  -Have AI research how to integrate itself with me because I haven’t the slightest idea – done

  -Integrate Zee with myself – done

  -By our powers combined Create controllable cells with Zee – done, that took a few attempts

  -Find previous cell escapees – as soon as I’m mobile

  -Get myself back to good – in progress

  -Start cellular upgrades – soon

  -Enable Safe Harbor and Pheonixyou misspelled this Jada protocols – next couple months

  -Fix spelling errors – soon

  -Find where those condescending pieces of shit live – after Safe Harbor and Pheonixit’s spelled phoenix Jada

  -Affix their heads upon their asses – can’t come soon enough

  -Add more so life won’t become meaningless again - ?

  ‘

  Jay..

  ‘I wonder if I can find a way to keep them alive with their heads attached to their asses or not, probably would be pretty easy if I take my time…’

  Jada..

  ‘I’ll never forgive them. Who gathers a group of twenty Phds just to tear apart piece by piece the research-’

  VICTIM!!!

  “WHAT?!”

  Get out of your head for a minute and look around, something happened

  ‘Something? That’s the most unsure I’ve ever heard Zee.’

  “Sorry Zee, what… do… you… Are you fucking kidding me?!”

  Opening my eyes I see that I’m no longer home. I’m fucking sitting in a field.

  ‘I’m sitting in a field, that doesn’t make sense. I’m sitting in a field that doesn’t make sense. There’s twelve moons, I’m sitting in a field and none of it makes sense. There too much oxygen, there’s twelve moons, I’m sitting in a field and absolutely none of it makes sense. This isn’t home. This. Is. Not. Home.’

  “Well fuck me sideways. Life sucks, has always sucked, and will always continue to suck.”

  Losing my desire to continue breathing by the second.

  Jada

  “Well life can suck my dick if I fucking had one!!!!”

  Jada

  Rolling over on my knees I start digging a hole in the soft dirt with my bare hands only slightly caring that I was making any progress.

  Jada please answer me, what are you doing?

  “I’m digging a hole.”

  Why are you digging a hole? Shouldn’t we be doing… anything else than that?

  “Meh, I want to bury myself, and digging a hole seems like a very good first step. Please leave me to my work.”

  J-J-Jada uh oh no. Need a distraction. uh, Jada look what you’re doing!

  “I’m digging a hole Zee, I don’t need to know anymore than that about it.”

  No Jada look, you’re using your legs!!

  Looking down I finally notice wiggling toes.

  ‘Man are my feet ugly.’

  “Okay fine I’ll live. Not like I absolutely needed revenge or anything like that. I guess their heads and asses are safe now! I kinda wanted to see how that would work! Alright now what?”

  Just like that?

  “Did ya want me to bury myself?”

  No. You programmed me to want to live unlike yourself. You die, I die.

  “Brat. What happened while I wasn’t paying attention?”

  Sensors scrambled while I was adjusting our nerves, couldn’t sense anything, then I sensed everything that you see before you and I.

  Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  “Hmmm. That sucks. Two and a half Earth atmospheres, closer to three actually. Based on my perceived weight closer to Jupiter in size than Earth. Probably why so many moons are pulled in. My knees hurt.”

  Your healing isn’t complete yet and now I have to adjust for your new found rotundness!

  “Call me fat again and… well I’ll do nothing, but it’ll hurt my feeling! How long until that is done by the way?”

  It’s a moving target unless you stop moving around for a little bit and let me work, unless you want to take over?

  “Nah I’m good, you’re better at the little things. I’ll just go daydream on that rock over there.”

  Good. Splitting off child process to monitor surroundings.

  ‘Child process, look Zee you’re a parent again. Too bad you kill your children so readily.’

  Not saying the joke out loud again as Zee never got it in the first place and explaining jokes kinda sucks, I unsteadily crawl over to the aforementioned rock and sunbathe for the first time in years.

  ‘Take that society, this failure can leave her basement. Just took a little longer than I wanted. Back to the list-

  -Start cellular upgrades – soon Priority

  -Enable Safe Harbor and Pheonixyou misspelled this Jada protocols – next couple months Priority one

  -Fix spelling errors – soon Delayed for now

  -Find where those condescending pieces of shit live – after Safe -Harbor and Pheonixit’s spelled phoenix Jada – delayed indefinitely

  -Affix their heads upon their asses – can’t come soon enough – delayed indefinitely

  -Add more so life won’t become meaningless again - ?

  -Dig hole – bury self – delayed indefinitely

  -Survive – for Zees sake

  -Find out where I am – Duh

  -Enact self defense protocol – soon

  -Find a local if there is any– after at least Phoenix

  -On the off chance they know a language I know – speak

  -Otherwise – pick brain – may or may not have to be literal

  -Find way home – do I even want to?

  ’

  Victim I’m done for now, will need to continue in the background but it’s close enough that we should find safety first.

  “You sure like to call me Victim…”

  It’s the only way to consistently get your attention.

  “Hmm. Lets save that for emergencies. My HUD identified a tree about twelve miles due north-northeast from here, so lets go there for Phoenix.”

  Sounds like a plan. Killing child process… Splitting off children for cell mitosis and cellular repair.

  I don’t have that good of vision nor is my HUD that great either, it’s just that this tree is incredibly obvious in this flat plain I’m surrounded by. It’s the largest tree I have ever seen. It looks like an old willow but blood red. As I get closer to it, the grasses I’ve been surrounded by since I got here have begun to thin out to almost nothing. Stopping at the edge of the clearing -

  “Still four miles to go and I’m starting to think that tree is responsible for the lack of… well everything. No assumptions, so lets check out this dirt here first.”

  Stick your finger in it.

  “Why does it have to be my finger.”

  I technically don’t have one.

  “Perfect excuse.”

  Beginning analysis… there’s nothing wrong with this soil.

  “Nothing?”

  Nothing, I’d honestly expect a dense forest with how nutritious this soil is. Try digging down deeper.

  Digging down a few inches I find what the problem is. There is a sea of roots barely hidden beneath, all seem to be wiggling and moving out and away from the tree with that same nasty red color to them.

  “I’m not touching them.” Touch them.

  Impasse detected, splitting off RNG process… Says touch them.

  I’d be questioning the results if Zee didn’t worship RNG like a god.

  “Lucky little shit.”

  Pulling out the little knife I keep in my pocket at all times, I do what RNGesus has declared and poke the roots. Nothing.

  “See? Nothing.”

  Touch. Them.

  Trying not to roll my eyes out of their sockets, I give up and touch the roots… Still nothing.

  “All that tension for nothing, I’m sure someone out there is shaking their fist in the air.”

  I am. Collecting sample… Complete. Will need time to fully analyze. Splitting off child.

  “Well that’s enough non-fun for the rest of the day. Lets tread carefully.”

  Burying the roots I tentatively take a couple steps forward fully expecting the silence to be a lie, but that tree is doing its level best to continue being a tree.

  Getting about a hundred steps into the clearing there is a change, but not with the tree.

  We’re being hunted.

  “There’s the words I didn’t want to hear you say. Where the hell did that come from.”

  Snapping my head to the direction of the indicator on my HUD I spot a mountain of muscle on four legs just outside of the edge looking ready to pounce. I think it can make that jump. So instead of standing there like an idiot I’m doing the best I can screaming and running away towards the imposing tree in the distance.

  “OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCK!!! WHY WAS I NEVER BORN A SPRINTER!! EXISTENCE IS PAIN!!!”

  Don’t get eaten it might be bad for their tummy, and that is also definitely bad for us!!

  Hearing thumping behind me I almost accept the inevitable, until the inevitable is snatched away before I have a chance to start repenting. Hearing pained roaring and thrashing I continue to run anyway. That is until I stumble from the ground rippling underneath me as the tree shows its first signs of life, blooming red flowers on the branches nearest to us like it’s celebrating.

  Getting flipped over and thrown around ass over head a few times I land on my side facing the hunter quite a bit away from me currently having one of its legs sucked dry by the roots that were buried underneath the ground, the smaller ones working their way underneath its skin.

  “Why didn’t the roots react to me?”

  Ask later, react now! Keep running, it’s breaking free!

  Getting further away from it, its thrashing is getting more and more violent until it seemingly figures its leg is a lost cause and starts bitting at its own shoulder. Separating from it quicker than I thought possible, it manages to throw itself back over the edge of the clearing and back to apparent safety, its left behind leg dragged creepily underneath the soil as it roars in pain.

  “That was metal as shit!”

  Look, red blood! They use hemoglobin as well!

  Leaving Zee to its excitement, I try to catch my breath while keeping a close eye on my pursuer. Short blue fur on what looks like a horned version of a wolf tiger hybrid but at least three times that size. When looking at the wound I’m left acutely aware of how quickly that would have been over if it had caught me.

  ‘Thank you my new tree god, because that would have been a whole bunch of bullshit.’

  “Keep licking your wounds asshole!! I’m going to keep walking this way!”

  My “brave” words are a little hollow as I walk backwards towards the tree never taking my eyes off of it. It never takes its eyes of me either, but there is nothing but a distinct look of hunger in its eyes as it breathes heavily.

  Eventually reaching the base of the tree, I’m left in awe at the sheer size of this thing. I’ve been walking in it’s shade for two miles.

  ‘If I ever die… this is where I want to be buried. This tree is a survivor and a destroyer. I love it.’

  “Perfect spot for Phoenix don’t you think? Hostile to the local fauna, so nothing will get close hopefully. Plus it seems to have access to plenty of nutrients for the process.”

  So long as it plays nice during the process. Splitting off Child monitor.

  “Only one way to find out. Also need to catch that thing when we’re done with Phoenix so we can compare and find out WHY it doesn’t react to us.”

  Bringing my hand forward and placing it on the tree we begin the process to make us technically immortal. I hope. I get nervous when things are going too well, even considering my near death experience.

  Initiating Phoenix protocol: input use password

  “Sigmund Freud had mommy problems.”

  Password created successfully. Taking half of self-sourced cells and local mental and genetic backup... injecting into Phoenix location… time to complete… four Earth days. Initiating Parasite protocol...Complete...

  “Four days huh? Eh don’t have to worry about starvation. Time for a much needed nap.”