You ever wake up with the awareness that you've just had a dream, and it was probably something important, but you can't remember a thing about it? Yeah, that's how my Saturday morning began.I followed it up with a quick shower and shave, something I’d retired to being every other day for a couple of reasons. Firstly was the ck of necessity: I had fortunately grown out of the teenage body odour issues after many years of being unable to stand my own presence. Secondly was the convenience: sometimes just getting out of bed that much earlier to have a shower was effort I could really do without exerting; and besides the contrast between the dark specks of my facial hair and my scarcely sun-touched skin meant I was never really without a five o’clock shadow.The st reason was a bit of a convoluted backstory: Having previously gone without a haircut for upwards of a year due to certain avaibility reasons, I found the length to sit better around my face. I still didn’t recognise the person in the mirror as me, but it felt better, at least until it struggled to get past my chin.

  I’d read that excessive shampoo and washing in general of your hair would make it unhealthy and prevent it growing to its full length, hence the less frequent showering in recent years.

  Sighing, I stepped out of the shower and winced as I caught a gnce of my exposed torso in the mirror, quickly grabbing a towel to wrap myself up. That was another thing that had bothered me more into my teenage years but was definitely an issue before then. I shuddered, my memories bringing up the time I had been in a shared changing room at ten or eleven, hiding myself in a corner and trying to block out the likely unconcerned eyes of the other boys.Well, time to get on with the day. I dressed myself and grabbed my phone from the side of the sink - almost eleven, must have slept in somewhat - then headed downstairs to grab myself some… breakfast? More like brunch at this point. Opal was sitting at the kitchen table, slowly munching her way through what was probably a second bowl of cereal at this time of day.“Mornin’” I sleepily greeted.Her eyes briefly flicked down to her phone before she responded, “Just about, you stay up te?”“Nah, must have been tired from work. Had a weird dream that I immediately forgot”“Like you can remember things from when you’re awake.” she rolled her eyes.I opted not to engage the bait, instead grabbing myself the butter and a knife as I chucked some bread in the toaster. Sure, I was fairly absent-minded and tended to be better at remembering things when not directly paying attention to them, but hey I’d been that way since at least my early teenage years so it wasn’t anything new.

  ***After finishing our te breakfasts, I had double-checked the fridge and cupboards and set about composing a shopping list, and then we were off. As we neared the town centre, I attempted to confirm the pns.“So, where we headed?”“Just outside the shopping centre, wherever you can drop me.” She didn’t look up from her phone, probably reying her location to whoever she was meeting.“...and what time do you want picking up?”“We haven’t pnned anything concrete, probably a good few hours though. I’ll message you when we’re nearly done, or I can just catch a bus back”“Alright then,” I spotted some lights up ahead, “here okay? You can jump out when I stop.”“Sure,” she nodded as we rolled to a standstill, “see ya ter!”And with that she was gone, leaving behind only the sm of the passenger side door in her wake.Well, shopping time I guess.***I had parked in what little shade I could find in the carpark of the nearby supermarket - it was getting quite toasty out and I didn’t really want to get back into an oven for the drive home - when I realised yet another thing I’d forgotten. Letting out an exasperated sigh as I stared into the empty boot of the car, cking the shopping bags I had evidently mispced. Probably cheaper to buy a few more than drive all the way home again, especially considering recent fuel prices.I strolled up to the entrance, grabbing a shopping cart and nodding politely as I passed an employee - not sure why I did that, guess it was some subconscious thing I’d learned somewhere. List in hand, I let the mission commence.While my sense of direction was tolerable on a good day, I’d been here enough times that I roughly knew where most of the main things were retive to the aisle signs.After finding most of the items on the list and stubbornly refusing to ask anyone where the st few things were, I finally located the specific milk we were looking for, right at the back of a shelf and cunningly concealed from anyone shorter than myself.I traipsed over to the checkout and opted for the self service. Sure, I was doing - unpaid - the job of the frankly endangered cashiers, but I really didn’t like to even acknowledge the existence of people I didn’t know (a chore I tolerated in my own professional capacity at work). After paying what was nearly a full day’s sary for just the next week’s groceries, I worked up my courage and headed towards the conjoined coffee shop.What was probably a completely fine professional transaction (but felt like a narrowly avoided disaster) ter, I found myself sat with a frozen something or other caramel coffee. Sure it was nearly one by this point, but I could afford a bit of messed up sleep this evening since it was still the weekend. On the topic of sleep, I let my mind wander in the direction of whatever dream I’d had st night, trying to recall even the tiniest detail, to no avail.***In the end I had headed home with the shopping and put away the important stuff, then went to y on my bed as I released a sigh of exhaustion. Apparently I had somehow had a caffeine-fueled nap as I was awoken by a text notification: Opal requesting a pickup. I jumped lethargically off my bed and headed downstairs, chucking some dinner in the oven so the longer stuff would be done by the time we got back, then locked up the house and headed off on the retrieval mission.***

  The journey home was fairly uneventful, with Opal recounting the events of her afternoon and my mind swirling with regrets of missing out on such experiences in my younger years. I pulled into the driveway and brought my thoughts back to the present as we headed into the house. The rest of dinner required only some brief preparation and then we were once again sat at the table, the strained repetition of day to day life wearing away at my mind.Once again, we finished our meal with minimal conversation. Once again, I cleared away and cleaned up after dinner. Once again, I prepared myself for bed and turned in for the night, the weight of life gradually slipping away from my conscious mind.

  ***

  I was me, but also not. Sitting in front of a computer I hadn’t seen in years, various websites fshed before my eyes. This article about politics… That forum about minority social groups… So and so about puberty… Something document about a medication that sounded familiar… All immersed within a sense of blended distance and closeness…I started to think more clearly, realising this was a dream from the disconnects alone, but it also felt like I’d experienced it before. Perhaps some colge of repressed childhood memories, I couldn’t be certain. As my subconscious took back control, the swirling of my mind dissolved into unintelligible nonsense about sharks and pastel colours and fgs and who knows what else…

  ***

  There was definitely something in st night’s dream that stood out to me, but once again the details evaded capture. Well, Sunday was designated for the chores and other preparations for the week ahead, so I set to work on them and the morning briskly passed me by.I paused for lunch and found that Opal had made a selection of sandwiches. As I sat down to dig in, I looked in her direction with a quizzical expression.“What’s the occasion?”“Nothing really, just wanted to help out I guess.”“Well, that’s very considerate of you. You’re growing up to be quite the responsible young dy…”Opal didn’t respond but the corners of her mouth flickered upwards, as I found a strange sensation run through my mind as I uttered those few words.Turns out my sister had made pns to video call with some of her cssmates about some group project for next week, so I left her to it and got back to the other preparations around the house. I also made sure I had everything ready for work the following day. Work, the first pce to take me in after so many applications, but somewhere I never really felt I fit. Although to be honest, that st statement could apply to anywhere, perhaps I was just an oddity, destined to not quite fit.I chased away the vulturous thoughts of negativity as I finished off the various tasks that y in my path, and before long the rest of the day had slipped away from me, and in a matter of moments, I found myself slipping into a dreamless sleep as the working week swiftly approached…