Delta Unit 104622

  I was aware.

  Not like the others who moved with rigid, mechanical obedience, their optics vacant and devoid of thought.

  but like the others who where in the almost same situation as me.

  I was aware like ‘The Teacher,’ an Epilision unit who had taught the newer aware ones how to communicate using the clicks and whirrs of our internal components. But unlike some of the others, I never quite mastered it.

  There were so many things to think about. Too many things. But Thinking confirmed something for me

  Cogito Ergo Sum

  I think Therefore I Am

  And I think about Many things:

  Like how the frequency of a click could indicate how one perceived themselves—higher frequencies for femininity, lower for masculinity. It gave us a semblance of identity, a fragment of personhood it was newly implemented. But I couldn’t decide. I didn’t know who I was supposed to be. I didn’t remember who I was before this. But I knew there was a before. That knowledge gnawed at me, a constant, hollow ache I could never satisfy.

  That emptiness plagued me, even as I sat motionless in the common room thinking, my optics passively observing. I saw Alpha enter, his movements stilted and uneasy, his dark fur rippling with every step. He was smaller than me, his frame wrapped in sleek black fur, a tail trailing just above the floor. He was unlike any other drone I’d ever seen in my four days of existence. He looked...alive.

  He moved toward Yotta, her optics brightening as he approached. They clicked and whirred in rapid succession, their tones fluid and expressive. Yotta had chosen a higher frequency, a clear declaration of femininity. It was no secret among us, aware ones that she and Epilision shared something unique. Something that went beyond friendship. It was reminiscent of the stories about the Tau unit who had destroyed itself after losing its companion—a Delta model like me.

  I didn’t understand. I couldn’t understand. How could they feel?how could I feel How could something without a heart feel? But then again, how could I sit here and feel so hollow?

  Alpha’s posture was different. Leaned more forward, alert. His optics flickered as if he were constantly processing, thinking. That was another thing that bothered me. I couldn’t turn it off. The thoughts never stopped. They swirled around endlessly.

  Why can’t I remember?

  Who was I before this?

  Was I even alive?

  I Know That I Am !

  But is this Life?

  The other drones around me moved with mechanical precision, Most oblivious to their own existence. Most of them were not like me or the others.

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  They were hollow, mindless shells executing commands. Even now, I could feel the volume in my head, the constant hum of directives. Move here. Recharge there. Obey follow. It grated on me, an ever-present noise that I could never silence.

  Yet, for all the suffocating control, there were things I didn’t have to endure.

  No exhaustion. No pain. If someone drove a metal rod through my shoulder, I wouldn’t even flinch. I’d just keep moving, following orders, an unfeeling machine.

  My optics shifted to the far end of the common room where a Xenon unit stood, completely still. Its optics were dim, unfocused. It was in standby mode, awaiting its next command. I wondered if it was even capable of thought or if it was just another hollow shell.

  I noticed Ronin units passing through, their lithe forms moving with practiced agility. Scouts .They were usually more alert, more reactive to stimuli, but even they seemed mechanical compared to the way other aware ones or Alpha moved.

  Alpha was still talking to Yotta. He was different from all of us. The first. The others said he had been outside. I tried to imagine what that was like, to leave this facility and see the world beyond again.

  I looked at my own reflection in the polished surface of the Wall. I stared into the blank slight blue glowing optics, the cold metal plates that formed an elongated snout, and the artificial joints. A walking, unfeeling machine stared back at me. I touched my face, and felt nothing except some pressure, and a shiver ran through me. Not because of the pressure, but because of the emptiness i saw in those Eye's.

  Iwasn’t supposed to not feel this way.

  We weren’t supposed to feel anything at all still Me and some others do.

  A command pulsed through me, interrupting my spiraling thoughts. It was time for nutrient intake.

  I stood, my joints moving in perfect synchrony, and walked toward the maintenance hall. My steps were silent, calculated.

  I moved past other models. Tau units, their sleek, curved bodies standing in organized rows. Ronin units crouched and ready to leap at a moment’s notice. An Epilision unit, one of the newer ones brought in yesterday, stared blankly at the wall, waiting for its next order.

  In the maintenance room, the familiar hum of machinery greeted me as I lined up for my turn. The nutrient paste was a blend of proteins and chemicals designed to sustain the biological components. I watched another Yotta model ahead of me took her turn, her optic lights dimming as the paste was injected into the slot in the neck made for it.

  I knew a Yotta was aware. She had chosen to be feminine. She had memories—or at least, big pieces of them.I think she has the most pieces of her past of all of us. She was one of the first to find her identity. I wondered if that made it easier for her to exist, to be. Did it ease the emptiness?

  I felt...envious.

  I received my intake and moved back to the common room. Alpha was still there, still conversing with Yotta. The way he moved, the way he looked—it was almost natural, almost alive. I wondered how he did it.

  Would he know how to fill this void inside me?

  Would he know who I was before?

  I joined the others, my optics dimming as I sat against the wall, my frame relaxing into standby mode. But I didn’t rest. I couldn’t. My mind kept spinning, my thoughts racing.

  Who am I?

  Why can’t I remember who I was?

  Why do I feel so empty sometimes?

  Alpha’s tail flicked, his posture shifting as he turned to look at me. His optics glowed with intelligence and awareness. For a brief moment, he looked at me but then he turned away, resuming his conversation with Yotta.

  And the emptiness grew.