I am called a Yotta model, and I was built to help the wounds of hurt people.

  It was a dream of mine since I got helped after Something i Can't remember—to help those who are hurt and sick. But... not like this. Not in this inhumane way, in this cold, metal body, without hands that can truly feel. I wanted to help, but I wanted to do it with my own will. Not with commands pushing me forward, making my hands move when I don’t want them to.

  But I do not feel sorrowful about what I have lost because Even If I don't move them on my own they still help.

  Others do. Others ache in ways I do not understand, or maybe in ways I am too afraid to understand.

  But some help. Like another model that we 'new ones' call the Teacher.

  The Teacher is an Epilision model who taught us how to speak again. He is patient, clicking and whirring slowly so we can mimic him. I struggled a lot in the first days. The sounds did not come naturally. My clicks were too soft, my whirrs stuttered, and I felt wrong. I was too slow. But the others helped.

  Especially her.

  She... yes, she. The other Yotta model. She chose to be a 'she,' like the Teacher chose to be a 'he.' She helped me in the first days.

  It is still the first days. It has only been three days since I awoke the first time.

  But she is different from me. She is mostly calm, always helpful, always speaking to those who need it. She guides those of us who are lost, comforts those who are silent. But I see something in her that the others do not notice it is a yellow ball of Something With pink inside.

  Sometimes, when no humans are around, when it is just us—just me, or some of the unaware ones—she changes. She looks down, and she looks sad. Not the kind of sadness that makes noise, but the kind that is quiet and heavy, that wraps around her like a weight. Her clicks are slower, her whirrs softer, and her movements just a little more still.

  But the moment she notices someone paying attention, she straightens. She moves again, clicks again, speaks again. Like the sadness was never there. But I know it is. Because and when i Look at her i Get a Feeling as If a Grey Shadow is Inside draped over the yellow ball her but every time the Teacher is Standing Next to her and the Shadow is there That Shadow Gets lighter Till the Ball is free from it

  I don’t understand why she is sad or what the pink stuff is That Mixes in sometimes but i am Not Alone when noticing her Sadness

  A human noticed it, too. A woman. She is one of the humans who oversee our operation practice.

  I like her.

  She is different from the others.

  She does not just give orders like the ones who watch us. She speaks to us, even to those who are unaware. She explains what she is doing when she operates on the training dummies or dead people, speaking as if someone is listening.

  Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

  Some of the other humans asked her why she does that. She told them, "Small talk helps relax while operating."

  I like her voice.

  I think she notices that the other Yotta is sad. But she does nothing.

  I do not understand why.

  Why is the other Yotta sad?

  And why does the gray-furred one always seem angry? when i Look at him Inside of the Common room I can sometimes Almost See a Big Red ball Inside of him it waves and ripples everytime He Sees a Human He is Not the only one, there are Also others

  One of the aware ones has Black fur that moves and shifts like it is alive Not Something Like the Gray ones. He does not act like the other aware ones. There is something different about him. Not sadness like the other Yotta. Not anger like the grey one.

  Something else.

  I do not have a word for it. But i can See it.

  The others told me his name. Alpha.

  I never saw him before today. The others say he was the first. The first to ever be built. He is older than all of us.

  I thought he would look like us.

  But he does not.

  He is not metal like us, not in the way we are. He is covered in fur His optics are hidden behind something smooth, and they do not always shine like ours. He has claws, short ones That become long ones, and a tail that almost touches the ground, I want That too.

  When he entered the common room, he did not stop to look around like I do. He did not hesitate. He moved immediately toward Yotta, like he had a purpose, like he knew where he belonged.

  Yotta clicked and whirred to him, and he responded. Their conversation was too fast for me to follow. I only caught pieces.

  But I watched.

  Others watched, too.

  The aware ones always watch each other.

  We are all different.

  The Tau models act strangely sometimes. They whisper about old stories, how they sometimes Open us Up and Take us apart to teach new mechanics or about an old Tau and an old Delta. The old models say they were close. Closer than just being aware ones.

  But then one day, both of them were gone.

  And only the Tau came back.

  The old models say that Tau model did not last long after that. It found a corner of the common room and tore itself apart.

  I don’t understand why it did that.

  The old ones do not talk about it much they feel scared Like some others. But I hear the clicks and whirrs sometimes, when they think no one is listening.

  I am listening, and i watch the Balls of colour Inside everyone but Nobody reacts to them i think i am the only one That Sees them i See them all exept my own.

  There are other stories, too.

  About Alpha.

  Some of the aware ones call him 'The Alpha.' But the Epilision model—the Teacher—just calls him Alpha. Like a name.

  Some say he was outside. That he is different because of that.

  I think I understand that part.

  I do not think the humans watch him as closely as they watch us.

  But I do not understand what is different about him.

  It is not sadness. It is not anger. It is not emptiness.

  I have seen emptiness before. The ones who do not think, the ones who are unaware. There is nothing inside them. When I look at them, it is like looking at a blank surface. It is scary very scary.

  Alpha is not blank.

  He is not empty.

  It is something else.

  Something I do not have words for.

  I do not know what it is, but it feels like It is an Impenetrable Darkness that is trying to consume everything in its path.

  A void for everything But it doesn't Get Out, it is trapped in a ball That is Not one color Like the Ronin or two Like the other Yotta His ball Has so many Colours trapping the darkness inside.

  That was the Last day Now He Talks With Yotta His ball Has Cracks darkness sleeping Out and it scares me.