The smell of the Adventurer’s Guild was atrocious, to say the least.

  Sweat, bile, alcohol, and dried piss. It smelled like a bad idea and loose change. And the balls on everyone inside that building, looking at us like we were the outsiders, were beyond baffling.

  I knew the idea of hygiene in this world was poorer than that of Earth. It was to be expected. But I know damn well people in medieval times washed. These fuckers straight up refused to, on principle.

  How do I know? The smell. Gods, I wanted to puke right then and there. Still, I kept it together when one of the clerks approached us the moment I told Enna to take the lead and take us through the Guild.

  “Good day,” said the young lady toward us before turning to Melsa and Arther. “Did you bring that person as the Guild Master requested?”

  Arther nodded at her question, pointing with his head toward me.

  The lady studied me for a few seconds, pulled out a small parchment, read its contents, looked at me, then looked at the paper again, before nodding in approval.

  “That is correct,” she smiled. “Please… sir, follow me.”

  “What about my companions?” I asked, turning to the others.

  But Enna interrupted. “We can grab a meal here. It also functions as a tavern. A lot more expensive than the normal taverns, but… will do while we wait.”

  How sweet of you to explain it so kindly… witch.

  “I see,” I replied, moving to the young lady. “Godspeed, then.”

  And with that, we were gone, walking up a flight of stairs away from the horrid smell.

  “S-sir, may I ask a question?” the clerk asked randomly as we were walking through a separate hallway.

  “Go ahead,” I shrugged, curious to see what she had to say.

  “It is said that you are a Vampire Lord and a King, is that true?”

  Figured… like, was any of us really expecting something else? I didn’t. I hoped for something more original, but I didn’t.

  “Yes,” I lied. Well, half a lie, since I was the Ruler of the Calcan Castle. How much does that cover, or what does that mean for me? I don’t know.

  Until recently, I was sharing that land with a tribe of savages that were kidnapping people to feed them to a snakebird, before they became the food itself. So I do not know if I am just the Ruler of the Castle or a larger territory. Ephe never told me, and I, for better or worse, have never asked.

  As we can all see, I have, what others may call, a fuckton of other issues to deal with, and until all those are done with, I cannot even start to care about what my title as Ruler of Calcan Castle stands for.

  “Wow…” the clerk muttered, side-eyeing me. “Never met a King before.”

  “Did you meet Vampires?” I asked curiously.

  “Twice,” she nodded with a smile, “Did not kill or turn me into one of them. Good folk.”

  Were the standards really that low? Is that why Relia began moving again under my clothes? She will scare the Pixie that stays hidden in my pocket at this rate.

  “I-I see. Lucky you,” I blurted out, hoping to change the subject before one of the two women hiding in my clothes jumped out and created more issues for me. But now that I mention it, having two women inside my clothes must be a situation that has never been seen before.

  “We are here,” the clerk said casually, stopping in front of a large set of doors that I did not even notice.

  She knocked lightly before pushing the doors open and ushering me in with a pleasant, office-like smile.

  “Good luck,” she uttered before closing the doors behind me, leaving me alone in a room full of people.

  You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

  Never was it mentioned that I was about to have a bloody conference. I did not get that memo. I was thinking I only had to speak with Airina’s aunt, Chartelia. She was in the crowd, but the crowd was enormous.

  “Welcome, Your Grace,” said Chartelia, getting to her feet. “Please, take a seat. We have much to discuss.”

  “Clearly.”

  I will not be boring you with the bureaucratic fuckery that ensued. From who am I, to who are my parents, trying to find me in any shape or form of record, where my Castle lay, my surroundings, for how long have I lived, and all that.

  It took two hours. Two entire hours.

  And guess what? They haven’t found jackshit in the records. Why? Because I lied. Was I to tell them the truth about being brought here by God-knows-what, the reasoning behind it, or what I was tasked to do? Would they even believe such nonsense?

  No… by my luck, if they were to believe me, they would see me as some sort of deity tasked with saving the world. But truth be told, besides Julia and a handful of people in this world, I couldn’t care less about any other fucker.

  “So…” I sighed, taking my hands away from covering my annoyed face. “Anything else?”

  “Yes,” said Chartelia. “And forgive us, but for the better part of three centuries since the making of this Adventurer’s Guild branch, we have gone into your territory with quests unbeknownst that it was under someone else’s rule. We thought of it as nothing more than wild land capable of threatening the continuous expansion of humans toward it.”

  “It’s fine,” I sighed. “You couldn’t have known. As I was saying, I was keeping to myself and cared not about such things. If the Great Velvet Forests were a threat to you, you dealt with it. That’s that. It’s not like you killed my kin. And it’s not like both of us are not aware of the people who live in the Forests either way.”

  “Yes, but…” Chartelia frowned. “By the laws under which we supervise and operate, we have been stealing for centuries.”

  “And for centuries, people did much more unspeakable things in those woods,” I countered casually. “If I were to count all the crimes people did in those places, all of you would be dead by the time I was done.”

  Having to lie to the point of not even thinking about it has become an issue, but I had to keep at it for as long as needed to maintain the image others have created of me. It benefited me. For better or worse, the whole bunch in this room full of couches, chairs, sweaty men, and panicked women, were respecting me because of those lies and propaganda Stevin had spread.

  The issue arose when it went beyond respect, just like when Enna started questioning whether I was some Divine or Evil being. Inside her head, I turned from a human to a Vampire Lord, into a full-blown God in a matter of weeks, and now, perhaps because of that same bullshit, I had to worry about the High Temples, even though I promised her I would go and visit one with her after Stevin’s situation was over.

  But does anyone actually listen to me? Partly. They hear what they want to hear and make the rest up by the image they have of me.

  Chartelia blinked once at my earlier words, amazed for some reason. And so was everyone in that room. Did I say something wrong?

  “I see…” she muttered, not explaining further, only changing the subject. “Either way, we can only answer for the crime we had committed. Unfortunately, having to pay for centuries of commissions on the quest we had would be impossible. But, if you could show mercy, we had prepared a draft contract, detailing Your Grace’s commission if you agree to sell us the rights to continue questing in that place. From foraging for wild vegetables and medicinal plants to kill quests, and harvesting lumber, everything should be written down. Please check the numbers and let us know what you think of it.”

  Yeah… so, this is what I meant. Exaggerated to the point of being uncomfortable.

  “Also,” she added, before I could even feel the headache coming in, “If you agree and sign the contract, we would like to visit your Castle at your earliest convenience and note down the delivery spot for any future payment of commissions.”

  I do not want to talk about the number or how much that would convert to in dollars, but it was easy to understand that it was more money than I could ever need. Even back on Earth, all the money that I had was going straight to Julia or spent on her. I had no need for all that, but for the sake of getting the fuck out of this place, I couldn’t care less.

  So I reached forward, grabbed, and dipped the quill in ink, and signed it as I would back on Earth. They were dumbfounded by the alien writing, only further deepening my image as some sort of, at least, ancient being.

  “How did it go?” asked Airina, seeing my pissed-off face.

  “As well as it could’ve,” I sighed, shaking my head and trying to ignore the nasty smell. “But at least it’s done. Let’s just go back to the mansion.”

  Luckily, they were all in agreement that they had spent enough time in this place, so they got up and joined me in ignoring everyone as we walked toward the door.

  That should’ve been the end of that, but the second I touched the door handle that would have taken us back into the city, doom came.

  [Warning.]

  [Several Lifeforms are Waiting for Elio.]

  [Intention: Vanquish.]

  I closed my eyes, prompting a sigh in utter defeat.

  “Your Grace?” Enna asked curiously. “Everything alright?”

  The absolute balls on this woman were heavenly-defying, making me chuckle to myself as I turned to look into her orange eyes.

  “Judas…” I muttered, pushing the doors open as I maintained eye contact, revealing to the others what awaited outside.

  The High Temples’ Templars were here to have a chat.

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